by Courtney Bloom, on Dec 18, 2025 1:52:13 PM
In male populated industries, women are often told that success is scarce, there is only one seat at the table, only one woman can lead and only one can rise. Over time, that message becomes internalized, shaping how women interact with one another in leadership spaces. One of the most damaging results of this conditioning is what has come to be known as queen bee syndrome.
Queen bee syndrome is not about ambition or confidence. As Chelsea Faulkner, Director of Operations at HandledNow, puts it, “queen bee syndrome is not confidence. It is fear in disguise.”
Understanding where this behavior comes from, how it shows up, and how to dismantle it is critical not only for individual growth but also for the long-term health of industries like trucking and logistics.
What Queen Bee Syndrome Really Is
At its core, queen bee syndrome is rooted in scarcity thinking. It is the belief that power, opportunity, and recognition are finite resources. When one woman advances, another must lose.
Faulkner describes it this way: women are conditioned to believe that “power is pie, and if another woman gains even a small slice, then that is going to diminish your own power.”
This belief often leads to behaviors such as:
- Withholding information or mentorship
- Undermining other women’s credibility
- Gatekeeping leadership opportunities
- Remaining silent when advocacy is needed
While these behaviors may feel protective in the short term, they come at a significant cost over time.
The Hidden Origins of the Queen Bee
It is important to understand that the queen bee is rarely a villain. More often, she is one of the first women who made it through deeply challenging systems.
Faulkner explains that many women in these positions “came through the fire and came out the other end burned.” They may have faced systemic bias, isolation, or constant pressure to prove their worth in environments that were never designed with them in mind.
What looks like hostility is often a trained survival response.
Research supports this reality. In male populated industries, women are twice as likely to report being undermined by another woman rather than by a male colleague. This does not happen because women are inherently competitive. It happens because systems reward scarcity and punish collaboration.
As Faulkner states plainly, “this is not a personal development issue. This is a systems issue.”
Why Gatekeeping Fails Everyone
Gatekeeping often feels like control, but in reality, it creates stagnation. When women feel they must do everything themselves to protect their position, burnout is inevitable, leadership pipelines dry up, innovation slows and trust erodes.
The long-term consequences include:
- High turnover among female leaders
- Lack of mentorship for emerging talent
- Repeated reinvention of processes instead of shared learning
- An industry that struggles to attract and retain women
Faulkner notes that in industries already facing talent shortages, especially female talent, this cycle does real damage. Instead of building legacy, women are left fighting for scraps.
A Real-World Example of Learned Scarcity
Faulkner shares the story of a senior leader, referred to as Sally, who hesitated to promote another qualified woman. Sally was intelligent, respected, and driven. Yet she feared that promoting someone else would make her replaceable.
Her thoughts were not malicious. They were deeply conditioned:
- What if she takes my role?
- What if I lose relevance?
- What if I am no longer needed?
As Faulkner explains, Sally “was trained to survive, not to lead.” The idea that another woman’s success meant her own downfall had been reinforced for years.
Rewriting those narratives became the turning point. Leadership, after all, is not about protecting relevance, it is about expanding impact.
Rewriting the Narrative of Leadership
One of the most powerful shifts women can make is unlearning the belief that someone else’s rise threatens their own.
"When we rise together, when we stand together, we build a platform for the next woman to step onto," says Faulkner.
Legacy is not built through hoarding opportunity. It is built through generosity.
Examples of legacy building actions include:
- Sharing hard earned knowledge instead of guarding it
- Opening doors and making introductions
- Naming women in rooms where decisions are made
- Advocating for others even while waiting for your own win
As Faulkner puts it, “every time you choose to share a resource or open a door, you are writing your legacy.”
The LEAD Model for Shared Power
To help women move from fear-based leadership to collaborative leadership, Faulkner introduces the LEAD model. This framework reframes leadership as a network rather than a ladder.
Look in the Mirror
Examine the beliefs driving your decisions. Ask yourself what story you are operating from and whether it is actually true.
Extend the Hand
Share your expertise. Offer mentorship. Model transparency. Collaboration begins with generosity.
Advocate Loudly
Speak women’s names in rooms they are not in. Celebrate accomplishments. Visibility changes careers.
Dismantle the Ladder
Challenge systems that reward hoarding recognition. Build new spaces and pull up more seats at the table.
Leadership, in this model, becomes expansive rather than competitive.
When You Encounter Scarcity in Others
Not every woman will be ready to let go of scarcity thinking. Some may undermine, withhold support, or attempt to make others shrink.
Faulkner’s guidance is clear:
- Do not shrink
- Do not retaliate
- Do not try to fix them
Instead, model what shared power looks like, choose integrity over ego and choose boundaries over bitterness. Responding with integrity gives permission for others to do the same.
As the saying goes, hurt people hurt others, yet empowered women empower others.
Choosing a Different Future
Queen Bee Syndrome does not disappear through shame or blame. It dissolves through awareness, accountability, and conscious choice.
“Sometimes the most revolutionary thing we can do is make one conscious choice,” says Faulkner. “The choice to lift instead of withhold and the choice to invite instead of compete.”
When women choose shared growth over fear, industries change, leadership changes and the next generation inherits something better than what came before.
The table was never meant to be small.
To view this webinar featuring Chelsea Faulkner, WIT members can visit the On-Demand Webinars page.
Not a WIT Member? Join now to view this webinar.
Related Articles:
- Ditching the Impostor Syndrome: Rewriting Your Inner Story
- The Art of Communication in Trucking
- Building a Thriving Workplace Culture
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